Dirtbag Of The Month

After giving this matter some careful thought, I have chosen this month's Dirtbag Of The Month. His name is Carl. He was a guest last week on Dr. Phil. The title of the show was "You're Not Hot Enough". He claimed to be disgusted by his wife's body. Ok, now she did have a lot of cellulite going on down there on her thighs, truth be told, but that doesn't make her a hideous woman. In fact, she has a very beautiful face, and she seems like a nice person. She feels so bad about it that they don't have sex and she won't let him see her naked anymore. Now I know that us women are our own worst enemies when it comes to body-image, and a man could tell us a thousand times that we are beautiful and we won't believe it, we still hate our thighs and wish we had perfect breasts and no stretch marks, but to let a man REINFORCE that idea is RIDICULOUS!!!!! It sickened me to see that show! I would NEVER let a man make me feel that way about something as stupid as jiggly thighs. I say, let the Cindy Crawfords and Pam Anderson's of this world worry about looking perfect, and leave me out of it.

Let's face it. I'm five foot nine, I weigh 160 pounds, I'm 36 years old, and I've had three kids. I don't work out and I don't plan to start. I ate tacos for lunch and I'm eating steak for supper, and right now I'm sipping a nice cold Heineken. I don't have a perfect body, nor do I care about obtaining one. I have a great sex life in part because I'm not worried about what I look like naked. If my boyfriend wanted to ditch me for somebody skinnier, then it would be his loss.

You know what Carl's wife needs to do? She needs to strip down naked in the middle of the afternoon, when the sun is at it's brightest in the house, and command that man to downright WORSHIP every inch of her skin, touch it, kiss it, inhale it. And if he's grossed out? Well... Since she's been on National Television, and a lot of single men have seen how beautiful she really is, she shouldn't have any problem finding a man who would do that mid-afternoon thing I just mentioned... AND THEN SOME! And then, well, I guess it would be... his loss!

And because he is that much of a stupid asshole, he is my DIRTBAG OF THE MONTH!